So... I've been throwing up on and off, daily, for over a week.
My ultrasound and initial prenatal exam are on Wednesday the 1st of July, and with the help of Fertility Friend we've determined I should be due around February 26th 2010. I'm going to bring my chart to my OBGYN so he can help confirm the dates.
I KNOW we shouldn't be celebrating so early... because anything can happen between week 5 to week 9 or so... but DAMN IT.... We totally can't help it. We've been trying since 2006, and damn it, I'm excited.
I have a lot of questions for my Gyno...
How will my Fibromyalgia affect my pregnancy? What about my Chiari? How is my IBS going to respond to pregnancy? There are a bunch of things I worry about.... Especially surrounding the Chiari... Since it's considered an "neural tube" defect... I worry if I've gotten adequate nutrition and vitamins this far... I've been taking a Prenatal, as well as a DHA & Folic Acid supplement. Then my Vitamin D and a Calcium supplement. ... so I have my fingers crossed.
We have a long road a head of us, but I couldn't be more excited about what the future holds...
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Monday, June 22, 2009
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Friday, June 19, 2009
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Um...
Well...
I've been nauseous and crummy the last few days.
Today, I went to the doctor, and had some blood work done.
it's official. I'm pregnant. I'm NOT kidding. I'm going to be a mommy, and Sean gets his 1st Father's Day this Sunday, which is also our 1 year anniversary.
I'm speechless.
I have to go back any day between Monday and Thursday to have a 2nd blood test, since my hormone levels are a bit low... but we're confident (me and the dr.) it's low because I am not due for my period until Sunday/Monday... so it's really early.
We haven't told anyone yet. We're waiting... until the 2nd round of blood work...
... and now I'm leaving to go camping. I'll be back on Monday...
I feel like I need to throw up. But I'm so excited.
Now... to see how pregnancy and Chiari play...
I've been nauseous and crummy the last few days.
Today, I went to the doctor, and had some blood work done.
it's official. I'm pregnant. I'm NOT kidding. I'm going to be a mommy, and Sean gets his 1st Father's Day this Sunday, which is also our 1 year anniversary.
I'm speechless.
I have to go back any day between Monday and Thursday to have a 2nd blood test, since my hormone levels are a bit low... but we're confident (me and the dr.) it's low because I am not due for my period until Sunday/Monday... so it's really early.
We haven't told anyone yet. We're waiting... until the 2nd round of blood work...
... and now I'm leaving to go camping. I'll be back on Monday...
I feel like I need to throw up. But I'm so excited.
Now... to see how pregnancy and Chiari play...
Saturday, June 6, 2009
a battle I can win
I’ve spent about 1/2 my life as a slave to pharmaceutical companies… from a young age, I found myself wrapped up in bottles of multi-hued pills and tablets. As a teenager, it was recreational (and stupid) just as kids are… but as I’ve grown older and approached adulthood, it was no longer fun, it was necessary.
By the time I was 18, the pain in my body and head were getting more and more severe. Migraines, back pain (I have an abnormal curvature at the base of my spine… no one knows how it was missed during all those scoliosis screenings in school), joint and body pain… that was later diagnosed as Fibromyalgia and Hyper-mobility syndrome, and my head pain… my dear and beloved Chiari.
Muscle relaxers (Flexeril, Soma, Baclofen) became a good friend around the age of 18… they made my back feel better, and usually my neck… and they helped me to fall asleep. They did little for any other pains though…
Shortly after that, I grew more and more affectionate toward pain killers. Percocet, Vicodin… and for all over body pain, Valium. They took away the pain that I had in my joints… Then there was the Fiorecet… that helped with the Tension headaches.
I became SO reliant on my medications that I would be in severe pain if I didn’t take some.
From about 18 to just after my 27th birthday, I don’t think there was a day that passed where I didn’t take SOMETHING.
I hid my love of colored tablets well. Functioned, worked at times 2 jobs and went to school… but it grew harder and harder to deal with. There were points where I had 2 Primary Care physicians and BOTH were giving me different meds… one would give me Flexeril and Percocet, the other, Soma and Vicodin. I was always stocked.
As the pain in my body grew and because worse, I started seeing specialists and other doctors… (Neurologist, Neurosurgeons, Rheumatist…) and everyone would have a different pill in mind for a different ailment. My dresser looked like a shelf in a pharmacy. 5-10 little orange bottles, with labels with names of pills that made people look at me like I was crazy.
I’m an addict. Plain and simple. And I always will be.
I tried time after time to just take things when I had pain, but it would only last that way for a short amount of time. After a few days of “behaving” I’d end up with a mix of different pills dissolving in my belly and filling my veins with a calming happiness.
If it hadn’t been for Monkey, my sister and my friends, I don’t think I could have ever stopped. At the end I was averaging 4-6 Muscle relaxers a day, 4-8 Vicodins a day, and then I had my random Percocets and Valiums or Fiorecets. Body full of pills, at all times, morning, day, night… and in the evening, washed down with a tasty adult beverage.
I conquered my “demon” on Christmas day 2008. I stopped. I shook UNCONTROLLABLY for days. Vomiting, doubled over in pain, sweating, freezing, and every muscle and joint in my body was on fire. Monkey supported me in a way I never could have imagined. So strong for me… and no one had ever cared that much before.
I had my surgery in January 2009… I was afraid. I KNEW I’d been “clean” less than a month, and I was going to be thrown head first into that element again. But I was stronger this time. I made a bottle of pills meant for 20days last about 2 months. I tried to just take Tylenol or Motrin when I could. And I did. I succeeded.
Hot showers and heating pads replaced bottles …. Stretching and yoga replaced pills. Slow and steady.
I stopped all meds in March… 2 months after surgery. VERY rarely I need a muscle relaxer, but I try to only take 1/2 a pill now… and that’s 1/2 a pill a week, and only if the muscle pain in my neck is unbearable.
Multi Vitamins, Vitamin D and Calcium have become the main staples of my “pill” diet now. And Tons of water and green tea. The pain was for a reason. My Vitamin D deficiency, lack of minerals and nutrients my body REALLY needed…
I’ll always have that “itch” in the back of my brain that I will want to scratch… but I know I can’t. I’ve been put in the situation where my old best bottle friends were right in front of me, and I held on to Monkey’s hand and realized that the life I have now is the life that’s worth living… not where I was. He reminds me to be strong. Not just for him, but for myself. He reminds me that I need to take care of myself for ME… because no one else can do it for me.
… and to take care of myself for our future family.
I’m healthier now than I’ve been in years. I’m not the HEALTHIEST person alive, and I never will be. But I’m the healthiest me I can be. I’m clean, for the 1st time in 10 years, I’m clean, and I’m enjoying my life that way.
I didn’t need an inpatient program, or a counselor… but I’m not like anyone else. Some people NEED that help, and maybe someday in the future, I’ll need to see someone to stay on the straight and narrow. I’ve even debated NA classes to make sure I can do it. But I know I can now. A week was the longest time I ever spent with out the pills, and that was just to try to drop my tolerance.
What’s amazing, is that I don’t even LIKE the feeling the meds gave me before. Post Op, I hated that lack of control feeling… and I had so many meds in the hospital (Morphine, Valium, Toradol, Percocet) and I hated the lack of control.
It’s going to be a long road, but it’s worth it. My body is cleaned out, and being healthy is the 1st step to a healthy baby…
With that being said... http://www.theantidrug.com . This is occuring more in more in Teens and young adults, and there is a high abuse level for Rx meds, and parents don't know. Please, educate yourself and safeguard your home and your children.
By the time I was 18, the pain in my body and head were getting more and more severe. Migraines, back pain (I have an abnormal curvature at the base of my spine… no one knows how it was missed during all those scoliosis screenings in school), joint and body pain… that was later diagnosed as Fibromyalgia and Hyper-mobility syndrome, and my head pain… my dear and beloved Chiari.
Muscle relaxers (Flexeril, Soma, Baclofen) became a good friend around the age of 18… they made my back feel better, and usually my neck… and they helped me to fall asleep. They did little for any other pains though…
Shortly after that, I grew more and more affectionate toward pain killers. Percocet, Vicodin… and for all over body pain, Valium. They took away the pain that I had in my joints… Then there was the Fiorecet… that helped with the Tension headaches.
I became SO reliant on my medications that I would be in severe pain if I didn’t take some.
From about 18 to just after my 27th birthday, I don’t think there was a day that passed where I didn’t take SOMETHING.
I hid my love of colored tablets well. Functioned, worked at times 2 jobs and went to school… but it grew harder and harder to deal with. There were points where I had 2 Primary Care physicians and BOTH were giving me different meds… one would give me Flexeril and Percocet, the other, Soma and Vicodin. I was always stocked.
As the pain in my body grew and because worse, I started seeing specialists and other doctors… (Neurologist, Neurosurgeons, Rheumatist…) and everyone would have a different pill in mind for a different ailment. My dresser looked like a shelf in a pharmacy. 5-10 little orange bottles, with labels with names of pills that made people look at me like I was crazy.
I’m an addict. Plain and simple. And I always will be.
I tried time after time to just take things when I had pain, but it would only last that way for a short amount of time. After a few days of “behaving” I’d end up with a mix of different pills dissolving in my belly and filling my veins with a calming happiness.
If it hadn’t been for Monkey, my sister and my friends, I don’t think I could have ever stopped. At the end I was averaging 4-6 Muscle relaxers a day, 4-8 Vicodins a day, and then I had my random Percocets and Valiums or Fiorecets. Body full of pills, at all times, morning, day, night… and in the evening, washed down with a tasty adult beverage.
I conquered my “demon” on Christmas day 2008. I stopped. I shook UNCONTROLLABLY for days. Vomiting, doubled over in pain, sweating, freezing, and every muscle and joint in my body was on fire. Monkey supported me in a way I never could have imagined. So strong for me… and no one had ever cared that much before.
I had my surgery in January 2009… I was afraid. I KNEW I’d been “clean” less than a month, and I was going to be thrown head first into that element again. But I was stronger this time. I made a bottle of pills meant for 20days last about 2 months. I tried to just take Tylenol or Motrin when I could. And I did. I succeeded.
Hot showers and heating pads replaced bottles …. Stretching and yoga replaced pills. Slow and steady.
I stopped all meds in March… 2 months after surgery. VERY rarely I need a muscle relaxer, but I try to only take 1/2 a pill now… and that’s 1/2 a pill a week, and only if the muscle pain in my neck is unbearable.
Multi Vitamins, Vitamin D and Calcium have become the main staples of my “pill” diet now. And Tons of water and green tea. The pain was for a reason. My Vitamin D deficiency, lack of minerals and nutrients my body REALLY needed…
I’ll always have that “itch” in the back of my brain that I will want to scratch… but I know I can’t. I’ve been put in the situation where my old best bottle friends were right in front of me, and I held on to Monkey’s hand and realized that the life I have now is the life that’s worth living… not where I was. He reminds me to be strong. Not just for him, but for myself. He reminds me that I need to take care of myself for ME… because no one else can do it for me.
… and to take care of myself for our future family.
I’m healthier now than I’ve been in years. I’m not the HEALTHIEST person alive, and I never will be. But I’m the healthiest me I can be. I’m clean, for the 1st time in 10 years, I’m clean, and I’m enjoying my life that way.
I didn’t need an inpatient program, or a counselor… but I’m not like anyone else. Some people NEED that help, and maybe someday in the future, I’ll need to see someone to stay on the straight and narrow. I’ve even debated NA classes to make sure I can do it. But I know I can now. A week was the longest time I ever spent with out the pills, and that was just to try to drop my tolerance.
What’s amazing, is that I don’t even LIKE the feeling the meds gave me before. Post Op, I hated that lack of control feeling… and I had so many meds in the hospital (Morphine, Valium, Toradol, Percocet) and I hated the lack of control.
It’s going to be a long road, but it’s worth it. My body is cleaned out, and being healthy is the 1st step to a healthy baby…
With that being said... http://www.theantidrug.com . This is occuring more in more in Teens and young adults, and there is a high abuse level for Rx meds, and parents don't know. Please, educate yourself and safeguard your home and your children.
Friday, June 5, 2009
more Chiari and Pregnancy
http://www.conquerchiari.org/subs%20only/volume%203/issue%203(4)/chiari%20&%20pregnancy%203(4).asp
From CONQUER CHIARI
Even when all Chiari related pregnancy reports are combined, the number of cases is too few to draw strong conclusions. However, it is encouraging that at least several women with Chiari have been able to have successful pregnancies without aggravating their symptoms.
Interestingly, despite these publications, a number of women have reported anecdotally that pregnancy/delivery actually triggered their initial symptoms. In Milhorat's landmark study, 16 out of 364 Chiari patients reported pregnancy as a precipitating event. Is it possible that pregnancy can trigger initial symptoms, but in general does not worsen existing ones? Like so many Chiari related questions, the answer to this one will require much more research
From CONQUER CHIARI
Since Chiari often is diagnosed in a person's late 20's or early 30's, many women with Chiari become concerned whether it will impact their plans for a family. Beyond the question of whether Chiari can be passed to children, there is a concern about whether pregnancy, and more importantly labor, can cause Chiari symptoms to get worse.
Their concern is certainly valid. Chiari symptoms in general can get worse with straining and exertion, and there is no straining quite like that associated with labor and delivery. The contractions and pushing that occur during labor are likely to increase the pressure of the CSF inside the brain and spine. In addition, anesthesia is often given either just outside the dura or into the CSF space itself, raising other concerns.
While there is little research in this area, the few case studies which have been published (see Related Articles) are generally positive. These case studies have shown that with proper management, delivery is possible without aggravating Chiari symptoms.
In the February, 2005 issue of the Journal of Perinatology, Diane Mueller, a neurosurgical nurse doctorate, and Dr. John Oro, a neurosurgeon, add to this evidence by presenting seven cases of Chiari and pregnancy. In looking at the subject, Dr. Mueller wanted to answer three questions:
1) Is there a change or worsening of Chiari related symptoms during pregnancy, delivery, or post-partum?
2) Does epidural or intrathecal anesthesia change or worsen symptoms?
3) Are there any Chiari related complications during delivery or post-partum?
To answer these questions, Dr. Mueller asked 7 women who were diagnosed with Chiari and were pregnant either at the time they were evaluated or some time afterward to fill out answer a questionnaire. The questionnaire asked about symptoms experienced during the pregnancy, the type of delivery, anesthesia used, symptoms after delivery, and whether there were any complications.
The average age of the women was 29 (see Table1). The average size of the Chiari malformation was 9mm and two of the women had syrinxes as well. Most of the women got pregnant after undergoing decompression surgery, but two of the women were pregnant before surgery.
Table 1 - Selected Characteristics of 7 Pregnancies
| Case | Age | CM Size (mm) | SM (Y/N) | Length of Labor (Hours) | Anesth. | Type of Delivery | Surgery Before or After Delivery |
| 1 | 30 | 8 | Y | 9 | Epidural | Vaginal | After |
| 2 | 28 | 7 | N | 3 | None | Vaginal | After |
| 3 | 27 | 4 | N | 6 | Epidural | Vaginal | Before |
| 4 | 30 | 19 | Y | 3.5 | None | Vaginal | Before |
| 5 | 23 | 3 | N | 1 | None | Vaginal | Before |
| 6 | 31 | 10 | N | .33 | Epidural | Not Clear | Before |
| 7 | 32 | 13 | N | 7 | Epidural | Vaginal | Before |
Overall, the group fared very well. For most of the women, some symptoms got slightly worse during pregnancy but resolved fairly quickly (see Table 2). Interestingly, in some cases symptoms - mostly headaches - actually got better at times during the pregnancy. Labor and delivery didn't aggravate symptoms at all, and only one woman had a slight problem post-partum which resolved in the near-term. Anesthesia did not seem to be an issue as well, with several women receiving epidurals with no problems. Overall there were no Chiari related complications during delivery.
Table 2 - Summary of Symptom Changes During & After Pregnancy
| Case | Pregnancy | Labor/Delivery | Post-Partum |
| 1 | Slightly worse | None | None |
| 2 | Some slightly better, some slightly worse | None | None |
| 3 | Some better, some worse | None | None |
| 4 | Slightly worse | None | None |
| 5 | None | None | None |
| 6 | Some slightly better, some slightly worse | None | None |
| 7 | None | None | Short-term neck pain, spasms |
Interestingly, despite these publications, a number of women have reported anecdotally that pregnancy/delivery actually triggered their initial symptoms. In Milhorat's landmark study, 16 out of 364 Chiari patients reported pregnancy as a precipitating event. Is it possible that pregnancy can trigger initial symptoms, but in general does not worsen existing ones? Like so many Chiari related questions, the answer to this one will require much more research
Chiari and Pregnancy
CHIARI AND PREGNANCY (BY TCI)
"Not all Chiarians are created equal. It is important to see a specialist in the field to properly evaluate how to deliver if you have Chiari Malformation/ Syringomyelia. The presence of SM may require C-section rather than vaginal delivery.
Patients with Posterior Fossa Decompression who are pregnant: Patients with successful decompression or very minimal Chiari symptoms have less risk when an epidural is part of the plan. If prolonged labor occurs this can put more pressure on the central nervous system (brain and spinal column) and the option for a C-section should be considered. If you have had a successful decompression a vaginal delivery should be considered. Some patients are under-decompressed, so this rule is only true for successful PFD's. In order to know if you are a successful decompression you need an MRI of the brain and some resolution of symptoms.
Patients without a Posterior Fossa Decompression and no SM: They are usually monitored closely. Anepidural can worsen CM/SM if the epidural is performed too deep (goes past the dura). Also a vaginal delivery can make CM worse if you have a syrinx.
Patients with NO decompression and with SM: The size of the syrinx matters. An open MRI is recommended at 35 weeks gestation. If the MRI reveals a larger syrinx or neurological signs are increasing, a C-section is indicated. If one is stable and the syrinx has not changed, you may proceed to the 40th week of pregnancy and be careful with the epidural as stated above.
Of course, if you are disproportioned (the baby is larger than your birth canal) one must go C-section. Usually during pregnancy many patients feel better and some of your symptoms can improve. Every patient is different and on should have an evaluation prior to delivery."
"Not all Chiarians are created equal. It is important to see a specialist in the field to properly evaluate how to deliver if you have Chiari Malformation/ Syringomyelia. The presence of SM may require C-section rather than vaginal delivery.
Patients with Posterior Fossa Decompression who are pregnant: Patients with successful decompression or very minimal Chiari symptoms have less risk when an epidural is part of the plan. If prolonged labor occurs this can put more pressure on the central nervous system (brain and spinal column) and the option for a C-section should be considered. If you have had a successful decompression a vaginal delivery should be considered. Some patients are under-decompressed, so this rule is only true for successful PFD's. In order to know if you are a successful decompression you need an MRI of the brain and some resolution of symptoms.
Patients without a Posterior Fossa Decompression and no SM: They are usually monitored closely. Anepidural can worsen CM/SM if the epidural is performed too deep (goes past the dura). Also a vaginal delivery can make CM worse if you have a syrinx.
Patients with NO decompression and with SM: The size of the syrinx matters. An open MRI is recommended at 35 weeks gestation. If the MRI reveals a larger syrinx or neurological signs are increasing, a C-section is indicated. If one is stable and the syrinx has not changed, you may proceed to the 40th week of pregnancy and be careful with the epidural as stated above.
Of course, if you are disproportioned (the baby is larger than your birth canal) one must go C-section. Usually during pregnancy many patients feel better and some of your symptoms can improve. Every patient is different and on should have an evaluation prior to delivery."
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Baby Brain...
We're smack dab in the middle of our 3rd cycle Trying to Conceive....
Most of our friends know that we're trying to get knocked up, but not many actually know what I'm going thru to try to achieve this, and to make Monkey a daddy. (and of course, me a mommy!)
I have a chart...
http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/brash_beauty/
I take my temperature EVERY day at 6am, whether or not I HAVE TO GET UP AT THAT TIME OR NOT. (believe me, It's not something I'm getting adjusted to)
I take Ovulation Predictor tests. I pee on a stick every day for like a WEEK until it's positive, and even then, it's a guessing game of when I'll actually ovulate. (up to 48hours later).
I keep track of when we're... intimate (or at least try to. I miss days here and there if they aren't in the "fertile time frame")
I take supplements and vitamins to "enhance my chances" of being fertile.
I mean, I KNOW we could try the "laid back" approach with no charts, timing, temps... and just wing it. We did that last time... for 18months we were just "winging" it... and nothing. I am trying to increase our chances, and if it doesn't happen after 6months, have some thing to show my doctor and say "LOOK! We tried, we timed it perfectly, we did everything we could" and then try to move on with treatments.
I was told when I was younger that due to the cysts on my ovaries I'd have issues getting pregnant. Then I was told that I didn't ovulate. Then I had the precancerous cervical cells removed and that left a little bit of scar tissue on my cervix that could make it harder to get pregnant (and then there is also a concern that because I had to have that portion of my cervix removed that it could be weakened during pregnancy and I may need to go on bedrest early)
My CURRENT Gyno is amazing. He tells me everything, whether I want to hear it or not. He let me know that the cysts shouldn't cause an issue, and well, it's apparent I'm ovulating because of my charts and OPKs (those ovulation tests).
Monkey has been awesome about everything. He's learned more about Basal Body Temperature (that's your temp as SOON as you wake up... that's why I chart at 6am every day), about Cervical position and bodily fluids... and he's seen more tests with lines on them then I think he's ever wanted to. He has an idea of how to read my chart, what #'s are good, what stats look off... and it's weird. ha.
It's always amazed me how many people "accidentally" get pregnant when there is such a small fertile window each month! Yes. I'm jealous. there I said it.
I'm hoping something happens soon.... because every negative test hurts just a little more than the last, and it's incredibly discouraging....
Most of our friends know that we're trying to get knocked up, but not many actually know what I'm going thru to try to achieve this, and to make Monkey a daddy. (and of course, me a mommy!)
I have a chart...
http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/brash_beauty/
I take my temperature EVERY day at 6am, whether or not I HAVE TO GET UP AT THAT TIME OR NOT. (believe me, It's not something I'm getting adjusted to)
I take Ovulation Predictor tests. I pee on a stick every day for like a WEEK until it's positive, and even then, it's a guessing game of when I'll actually ovulate. (up to 48hours later).
I keep track of when we're... intimate (or at least try to. I miss days here and there if they aren't in the "fertile time frame")
I take supplements and vitamins to "enhance my chances" of being fertile.
I mean, I KNOW we could try the "laid back" approach with no charts, timing, temps... and just wing it. We did that last time... for 18months we were just "winging" it... and nothing. I am trying to increase our chances, and if it doesn't happen after 6months, have some thing to show my doctor and say "LOOK! We tried, we timed it perfectly, we did everything we could" and then try to move on with treatments.
I was told when I was younger that due to the cysts on my ovaries I'd have issues getting pregnant. Then I was told that I didn't ovulate. Then I had the precancerous cervical cells removed and that left a little bit of scar tissue on my cervix that could make it harder to get pregnant (and then there is also a concern that because I had to have that portion of my cervix removed that it could be weakened during pregnancy and I may need to go on bedrest early)
My CURRENT Gyno is amazing. He tells me everything, whether I want to hear it or not. He let me know that the cysts shouldn't cause an issue, and well, it's apparent I'm ovulating because of my charts and OPKs (those ovulation tests).
Monkey has been awesome about everything. He's learned more about Basal Body Temperature (that's your temp as SOON as you wake up... that's why I chart at 6am every day), about Cervical position and bodily fluids... and he's seen more tests with lines on them then I think he's ever wanted to. He has an idea of how to read my chart, what #'s are good, what stats look off... and it's weird. ha.
It's always amazed me how many people "accidentally" get pregnant when there is such a small fertile window each month! Yes. I'm jealous. there I said it.
I'm hoping something happens soon.... because every negative test hurts just a little more than the last, and it's incredibly discouraging....
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